do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
