I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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