I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Randomize
