What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Randomize
