he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
