summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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