Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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