Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize