It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize