I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize