At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I understand Curling. That high.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
they're like a gay fantastic four
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
