How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
