at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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