She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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