he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize
