I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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