FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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