Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Randomize