Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
