he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
