help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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