tell your sister to shave her snatch
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Randomize
