Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Girls should come with a carfax report
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Randomize
