I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I FOUND THE LEGS
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
