You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize