HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Randomize
