why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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