Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
