I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize