Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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