I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
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