just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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