On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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