My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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