are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize