don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
