I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
