Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
