Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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