So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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