Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
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