is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
And then my night got REAL pukey
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
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