I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
do herpes really smell.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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