I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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