We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
okay pat passed out under dana's car
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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