I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Randomize
