if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
