god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Randomize
