hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
