Buhtt sex?
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
